Lay it down and take the next step!

Illuminating a small circle just in front of my feet, the flashlight provided safety and direction for only my next step as I took a pre-sunrise walk this morning. Anxiety eventually gave way to comfort as I thought about my life. I knew the light would lead me in the right direction. I just had to take the next step...

Taking the next step is something Jesus recommended a very long time ago. "Come and you will see." "Follow me." These were the words Jesus spoke to the disciples as He called them. He didn't sit them down and reveal what the next three years would hold. He knew they would be overwhelmed; possibly even turn around. He chose to keep it simple. "Follow me" was all He said. Take the next step...

As a teen, I wanted to know my future. Will all my dreams come true? What college will I attend? Will I work in a church; marry a pastor? Will I live in NC near my family? Jesus knew the answers to those questions all along. I did go to college. I do work in a church, I met an amazing Christian man who I want to be with for the rest of my life. I dont live in NC, but my family is still close. He knew. In wisdom, He chose to reveal only enough light for me to take the next step.

Sometimes, I catch myself wishing again that I could see my future. I get wrapped up in fear or worry. Career worries: Will I still have this job in five or ten years? Children worries: Will I be able to have children? Marriage worries: Will I ever get married? And will my marriage end up like my parents? I can spin around issues that really don't have anything to do with this day, with my next step.

Jesus knows. He knows which answers are "yes" and which ones are "no." He knows when and where to reveal to me my next step. My part is simply to take the next step in obedience.

When I was younger and still sometimes today, I did not understand those times when He said "no" were stepping stones to His amazing "yes." I learned in the dark that when I step forward in trust and obedience, blessing is down the path. I also had to learn that even those pathways that held pain where part of the process. They were stepping stones in my journey of choosing obedience over worry, fear and control.

I am learning to lay it down and lay aside my fear and control issues. Because I know that I am a control freak. I like to be in charge of my situation and I like to know what is going to happen so that I can have a plan. But I am also realizing that the perfect plan only exists in HIM. I cant plan out the perfect job, marriage, children, finances... but his plans will fit like a glove! IF I just take the next step towards his plans and not mine!

When fear and doubt surface in the dark I silence the "what ifs." I am trying to remember Jesus' words, "Follow me," and get back on the path that is flickering just ahead-and simply take the next step...a step of trust. Asking Him what I need to do for just today. I walk away from worry by expressing my concerns to Jesus and trusting His ability to take care of each and every step.

Father God, You know my greatest fear is the fear of the unknown... the things I cant control, not having a plan. The dark can be frightening. Jesus, sometimes my ability to trust seems so much smaller than the step I need to take. Help me to remember all the times you have provided and protected my next step. You never let me fall then and I know that you are still the same now!