Waiting...

Last night I came clean before my sisters in Christ and confessed my need for strength! I know better than to pray for patience... but I can pray for strength! And asking my sisters last night to pray for me was the best thing. I have felt such peace about my impatience today!!! I feel the prayers of my sisters interceding for me!!

I know that in his timing it will be perfect! I want it so bad... but if Gods answer for me is wait... then that is answer enough for me! I think I have been so caught up in trying to will God to say Yes to my prayers... that I have forgotten to slow down and LISTEN for him to speak to me and give me an answer. And its not his fault I haven't heard... its... MINE!!! I am the guilty party here!

I like what James said Sunday about making decisions not because someone else wanted him to or thought he should. I want it to be a decision that he makes because its what he wants. I am going to try my best to listen to the Lords answer and try to daily gain strength and peace about waiting for a yes.

I am not naive enough to think that its going to be easy. It will be hard when I get the questions about when Im getting married. And I know it will be easy to fall back into my impatient answers and say, " I guess never." Readers if there are any... I need prayers for strength! As I have said before I have made no secret that this is what I want... but if God is telling me to wait... then what other choice do I have?

SO I will wait until the Lord gives James an answer and trust that in his timing he will deliver within his will. He knows the desires of my heart and I trust him with it.

SO... I am waiting... even though it hurts... Im waiting