The darker the night, the brighter he can shine

What do you see when you look at your world today,
Is it so full of clutter that you feel like your going insane
But you can't fight back 'cause you're just too afraidAnd it feels like the clouds in your sky don't wanna change
You see theres always another story
Another side to every coin
But how you see your circumstance is all about a choice

When you see the rushing wing, feel the pouring rain
Hear the thunder now as the clouds roll in
You're blinded by the lighting
Do you also hear that still, small voice saying it's okay
You're not alone, you may be scared to death
But I won't let you go
You may think the sky above is falling
But can you hear Jesus calling

What do you see when you look at your world today
Do you see a glimmer of hope or has it all turned to gray
well start by counting you blessings one by one
And I'm sure right there you'll start to see the sun
You see theres always another story
Another side to every coin
But how you see your circumstance is all about a choice



Well yesterday as Im sure you have read was awful. I know that some people are facing way worse things, but I have never had to face the circumstance that I dont have the money to pay my bills. I am obsessive compulsive with my money because I work hard for it. I was left the bank after calling them out on a lie to me and then hearing them admit to it and not want to help me at all. When I started my car, this song was on the radio. I hear the part, "You may be scared to death, but I wont let you, you may think the sky is falling." I started bawling... I found the nearest place to pull over because I was shaking because I was crying so hard. I am tearing up now as we speak. I cant stop crying.

I met the devil face first yesterday morning! It never fails that when you have a good time in the Lord, he is right there not just knocking on my door, but banging! Bible school was such a blessing, I am just now getting recovered... but I have never been so challenged and changed in a one week span. Sunday, we found out that the guy preaching for us wont be accepting a pastor position. Which I must say, I felt from the beginning that he wouldn't be our pastor. But Sunday morning he told us all that we need to be praying harder than before. Satan is trying to destroy FFWB and its not just up to the deacons to pray for a pastor... its us as members that must pray as well. I am going to admit that since Tom left in October, I prayed for a little while, and then when the church split, my desire to go to church has hit rock bottom. Ill even admit that sometimes the only reasons Ive went is to see James... which is another problem in itself. But what he preached to us Sunday morning, struck a chord. I need to be praying constantly for my church and my church family. Especially for a pastor, but also for the needs of people in the body. We have members struggling, hurting, and its up to us to pray and lift eachother up.

I have no clue where the money is going to come from to pay my bills. I am literally scared to death. This is not my mistake, but no one wants to own up and fix it. So, I am leaning on one that never changes! Even when I let go of him, he NEVER lets go of me! He is right there looking ahead of me and providing a way when I right now dont see a way. I am gonna hold on and see what God does, I know he can and is able!

I cant wait for church tomorrow. I need to be among people that care and be surrounded by them. Please I ask everyone who reads this to pray for me. My faith is weak. I am scared to death and it does in fact feel like the sky is falling in on me and I do feel like I am going insane. But again I know that I serve one so much bigger. And I know that the darker the night, the brighter he can shine.