Blessings of growth wrapped in pain

I spoke up... Something I rarely do. I'm usually very quiet and keep most of my opinions to myself. I'm quiet mostly because I still stutter and I get my words tangled up and essentially am just insecure. Only around people that I know am I generally fairly articulate... Id rather just write... lol.

But in a conversation at work a few days ago as I was leaving, I couldn't remain silent. I knew going in to it that the people that I work with are not the least concerned about God or living a life that is pleasing to him. But I felt the urge of God that you can't ignore, I knew if I didn't say something I was absolutely going to explode. When I finished, the opposition began. I had typical comments thrown at me, "Well, I don't believe in your God, so I don't have to live by his rules." or " What makes you think that your right?" or the one that makes me shiver, "there is no God." Or they just had what they thought were good arguments to disprove God, but I have Bible evidence to back up what I believe. Not a theory that man has thought up, but God inspired evidence.

But even in knowing that I was right and had spoken the truth and had God right there in my corner and he had my back, before I could get to my car the devil in his deceitful way was on my case telling me that I should have kept my mouth shut, that there was no way that they would ever be persuaded to the truth and all I had done was became the unpopular one in the break room. Discouraged was my main emotion.

I'd read in Exodus a while back, about Moses in the midst of a very discouraging situation. After years of mistakes, lessons in the desert and insecurity in his speaking skills, he had finally done exactly what the Lord said. He had gone to Pharaoh and said, "Let my people go." Surely now all the pieces would fall into place. He was at the right time and place, and he had obeyed what the Lord had told him. Moses was about to learn a lesson that many of us are facing: The blessings that follow doing God's will are not always the ones we expect.

He may have expected Pharaoh to get a thoughtful look and say, "Of course you can go, Moses. I know that God is leading you, and we just need to do what He says." That's not what happened, though. Not only did Pharaoh mock God, he doled out even harsher treatment to the Israelites by forcing them to continue to make bricks without the provision of straw. The people were outraged, and they turned on Moses. How discouraging! Things weren't going at all the way Moses had imagined. Now that he was on track with God and walking in obedience, life was supposed to get easier. Right?

All the lessons Moses had learned in the desert shepherding for 40 years served him well now. We see that despite his disappointment, he turned to God in prayer. It was a distressed prayer, but it was real and heart-felt. When he faced an indignant Pharaoh and his angry people, Moses returned to God and poured out his heart. Exodus 5:22-23 tells us, "Moses returned to the Lord and said,‘O Lord, why have you brought trouble upon this people? Is this why you sent me? Ever since I went to Pharaoh to speak in your name, he has brought trouble upon this people, and you have not rescued your people at all.

When Moses returned to the Lord with the pain that he was feeling, the disappointment in his circumstances, and the confusion about his calling, God met him there. God didn't respond to Moses with anger or rebuke. He answered with a glimpse into future freedom and a rousing message for His people straight from the very heart of God. Moses' struggles didn't end there, but God had given him the encouragement that he needed to forge on toward the calling.

In the car, I set my cell phone down, closed my eyes and bowed my head. I poured out my confusion and disappointment to God, and He met me there. My emotions settled, my mind found rest and God's peace poured over me. He is good! Doing God's will is rarely easy, and the blessings of growth may come wrapped in pain. However, we will find Him to be faithful and His Word sufficient when we return to Him.